1 00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:51,466 Dad! 2 00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:14,466 ALBION RENEWALS 3 00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:13,166 You're not getting many, are you? 4 00:04:13,300 --> 00:04:14,333 Five seconds. 5 00:04:16,766 --> 00:04:19,800 -Cold? -Hungry. 6 00:04:24,266 --> 00:04:26,000 I know. 7 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:27,533 I know. 8 00:04:28,766 --> 00:04:30,700 I'll take you back. 9 00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:37,000 Who do you love most in all the world, Jimmy? 10 00:04:38,666 --> 00:04:40,700 You, Dad. 11 00:04:41,400 --> 00:04:43,533 Always, Jimmy. Promise. Always. 12 00:04:43,666 --> 00:04:45,666 I promise. 13 00:05:56,200 --> 00:05:58,266 So we went back. 14 00:05:58,566 --> 00:06:01,366 He told the police where to find us. 15 00:06:07,266 --> 00:06:10,300 He said he wanted us to spend some time together... 16 00:06:10,433 --> 00:06:12,233 ...to be together. 17 00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:27,400 They put me in another children's home and sent Dad back to prison. 18 00:06:36,533 --> 00:06:40,566 We could have stayed there more than those eight days. 19 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,800 I couldn't believe I wrote down a son... 20 00:07:21,100 --> 00:07:24,500 ...which may seem flippant to you, but it really was important to me. 21 00:07:24,633 --> 00:07:26,800 Then walking across the street here, I noticed-- 22 00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:28,700 How does your wife feel about it? 23 00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:33,266 -My wife? No, I'm not married. -Oh, I see. 24 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:35,433 Do you have to be married to adopt a child? 25 00:07:35,566 --> 00:07:36,800 No, but it's usual. 26 00:07:37,100 --> 00:07:39,366 -It's usual, but it's not.... -Yes. 27 00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:40,800 It's not obligatory. 28 00:07:41,100 --> 00:07:42,600 -Oh, well.... -Yes. Right. 29 00:07:42,733 --> 00:07:45,433 Look, may I ask you to take some of these leaflets? 30 00:07:45,566 --> 00:07:47,333 They could be of help to you. 31 00:08:06,033 --> 00:08:08,700 Do your neighbors know about this ambition of yours? 32 00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:14,500 I thought I'd wait until I'd reached the stage of being taken seriously. 33 00:08:14,633 --> 00:08:16,633 Does it matter to you what they might think? 34 00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:19,300 Well, they'll have to know. 35 00:08:19,433 --> 00:08:22,400 If I'm successful, they'll be the boy's neighbors too. 36 00:08:22,533 --> 00:08:25,533 On a scale of one to 10, what would you estimate... 37 00:08:25,666 --> 00:08:29,066 ...is your degree of security with your masculine role? 38 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,033 Sorry? 39 00:08:31,166 --> 00:08:34,033 Are you a "cuddler" or a "touch-me-not"? 40 00:08:34,166 --> 00:08:39,000 You do realize that as a single man, you'll only be offered the older... 41 00:08:39,133 --> 00:08:41,700 ...most difficult to place, emotionally disturbed boy? 42 00:08:44,100 --> 00:08:45,166 Very well... 43 00:08:45,300 --> 00:08:48,266 ...the department will allot someone to assess you... 44 00:08:48,400 --> 00:08:49,433 ...in your own home. 45 00:08:49,566 --> 00:08:52,033 -Someone? -Me probably. 46 00:08:52,166 --> 00:08:54,466 We're a bit short-staffed at the moment. 47 00:08:57,266 --> 00:09:00,433 My name is Graham John Holt. 48 00:09:00,566 --> 00:09:03,133 I am a single man, aged 42... 49 00:09:03,266 --> 00:09:06,733 ...attempting to adopt a 10-year-old boy. 50 00:09:07,066 --> 00:09:09,666 And to this end, I have been asked to write about myself... 51 00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:12,133 ...as honestly as possible. 52 00:09:12,566 --> 00:09:15,333 Since my mother's death 18 months ago... 53 00:09:15,466 --> 00:09:19,033 ...I have been postmaster at this village sub-post office... 54 00:09:19,166 --> 00:09:22,133 ...where I have lived all my life. 55 00:09:22,633 --> 00:09:24,566 The stroke my father suffered... 56 00:09:24,700 --> 00:09:28,800 ...has been made more complicated by depression following Mother's death. 57 00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:31,166 She was a local girl. 58 00:09:31,300 --> 00:09:34,100 Dad came from the north. 59 00:09:34,266 --> 00:09:35,666 They were a devoted couple... 60 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:39,133 ...who had hardly spent a night away from each other. 61 00:09:40,533 --> 00:09:43,666 At 7:45, I take Dad's breakfast to him. 62 00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:46,200 I usually try him with a little conversation. 63 00:09:46,333 --> 00:09:50,300 They said at the hospital I should keep doing that and not give up. 64 00:09:53,166 --> 00:09:55,600 If there is someone in the phone box across the road... 65 00:09:55,733 --> 00:10:00,166 ...I will name the person and speculate on whom the call might be to. 66 00:10:01,566 --> 00:10:03,633 He never replies. 67 00:10:07,700 --> 00:10:10,000 Cornflakes. 68 00:10:16,766 --> 00:10:18,266 Eight fifty-nine on the dot... 69 00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:22,066 ...I take up position behind the reinforced counter screen. 70 00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:25,266 No one has held me at gunpoint as yet. 71 00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:27,066 Good morning. 72 00:10:30,033 --> 00:10:33,133 Lynn, my part-time helper... 73 00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:35,666 ...lives in a caravan with her four children. 74 00:10:38,366 --> 00:10:42,066 Is that a hot water bottle under your coat, Elsie Needhan... 75 00:10:42,666 --> 00:10:44,333 ...or has that husband of yours... 76 00:10:44,466 --> 00:10:46,733 ...still not perfected the art of safe sex? 77 00:10:56,400 --> 00:10:58,133 Married bliss. 78 00:10:58,266 --> 00:11:00,633 Doesn't it make you wanna throw up? 79 00:11:02,566 --> 00:11:04,100 Hello, Edward. 80 00:11:04,233 --> 00:11:06,266 How are you today? 81 00:11:08,433 --> 00:11:11,733 Is there anything I can do to make you more comfortable? 82 00:11:23,533 --> 00:11:25,666 Does he know where he is? 83 00:11:26,066 --> 00:11:28,066 I have no idea. 84 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:29,566 Would I be right in thinking... 85 00:11:29,700 --> 00:11:32,800 ...that there's a fair amount of bitterness between the two of you? 86 00:11:33,533 --> 00:11:36,133 It depends on what you think constitutes a fair amount. 87 00:11:36,266 --> 00:11:38,300 I don't consider myself crippled by it. 88 00:11:38,433 --> 00:11:41,166 Just a little touchy on the subject. 89 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:49,633 I hope the house isn't always as tidy as this. 90 00:11:49,766 --> 00:11:53,100 Can I see it looking a bit more lived-in next time? 91 00:11:53,300 --> 00:11:56,166 I'm not from the Health and Safety Inspectorate, you know. 92 00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:59,600 And it is a 10-year-old boy you're hoping to have living here. 93 00:12:00,766 --> 00:12:03,466 I'm not as young as you think, by the way. 94 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:07,100 Nobody's allowed to do this job until their balls have dropped. 95 00:12:07,233 --> 00:12:08,633 Which reminds me... 96 00:12:08,766 --> 00:12:10,800 ...you need a support system. 97 00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:12,166 Sorry? 98 00:12:12,300 --> 00:12:15,400 One which the adoption panel will consider viable. 99 00:12:15,533 --> 00:12:17,500 Support means friends. 100 00:12:17,633 --> 00:12:20,366 If you haven't got any, get some fast. 101 00:12:20,500 --> 00:12:24,566 And kids, you need experience with kids. 102 00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:27,000 Babysitter, youth clubs... 103 00:12:27,133 --> 00:12:30,066 ...Boy Scouts, dib, dib, dib. 104 00:12:32,066 --> 00:12:34,400 What have we here? 105 00:12:35,066 --> 00:12:36,700 It was my mother's. 106 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:40,200 -For hair clips. -Have you ever had a girlfriend? 107 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:44,166 Elsie Bartlett. 108 00:12:44,700 --> 00:12:46,333 What happened? 109 00:12:46,466 --> 00:12:50,066 Well, we never seemed to find anything to say to each other. 110 00:12:50,333 --> 00:12:52,666 She married Champion, the Wonder Horse. 111 00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:55,466 -Lucky girl. -No, that was-- 112 00:12:55,600 --> 00:12:58,400 That was his nickname when we were at school. 113 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:03,700 I need to know what happened to send you scuttling inside your shell. 114 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,700 I mean, for God's sake... 115 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:09,533 ...what have you been doing with yourself sexually since you were 15? 116 00:13:09,666 --> 00:13:13,633 No more than what's usual I suppose for a person of my age and background. 117 00:13:14,066 --> 00:13:15,233 DIY. 118 00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:18,800 If that's what you wanna call it. 119 00:13:19,633 --> 00:13:22,000 Well, why haven't you put yourself about a bit? 120 00:13:22,133 --> 00:13:24,566 Masturbation's so unfriendly, Grae. 121 00:13:24,700 --> 00:13:28,733 Even in my busy schedule, I've managed to fit in one good screw a fortnight. 122 00:13:33,700 --> 00:13:37,600 I do have a small bit of news, if you're interested. 123 00:13:44,100 --> 00:13:48,366 So shall we open your life story book at the "my third year" page? 124 00:14:01,700 --> 00:14:04,033 -Tell me the news first. -Will you talk to me... 125 00:14:04,166 --> 00:14:07,533 -...about what's on that page? -I thought you didn't approve of bribery. 126 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:13,000 Open the book please and look at the page. 127 00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:17,566 I'm looking. 128 00:14:17,700 --> 00:14:19,800 Well, we think... 129 00:14:20,100 --> 00:14:23,566 ..we might have found the name of your maternal grandparents. 130 00:14:24,133 --> 00:14:25,233 Your mother's parents. 131 00:14:25,366 --> 00:14:28,266 I do know what maternal means, strange as it may seem. 132 00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:29,533 Can I close the book now? 133 00:14:29,666 --> 00:14:32,166 No. You still haven't said anything about that page. 134 00:14:32,300 --> 00:14:35,533 You want me to write their name in and another few question marks? 135 00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:37,466 Read me what's written on the page. 136 00:14:37,600 --> 00:14:39,533 You're joking! 137 00:14:56,166 --> 00:14:59,566 You don't face the past because that would mean admitting what happened. 138 00:15:00,266 --> 00:15:04,466 You're nowhere near being ready to start a new life with a new family, are you? 139 00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:06,366 -And who's gonna stop me? -You are. 140 00:15:08,133 --> 00:15:10,500 Do you know what I see when I look at you? 141 00:15:11,066 --> 00:15:13,166 I don't see a 10-year-old. 142 00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:16,233 I see a little 6-year-old who's just pissed his pants... 143 00:15:16,366 --> 00:15:18,233 ...and is about to burst into tears... 144 00:15:18,366 --> 00:15:23,300 ...so that everyone around him will say, "Oh, shame, poor little Jamie." 145 00:15:28,133 --> 00:15:31,200 You said this news came directly from the horse's mouth. 146 00:15:31,333 --> 00:15:33,766 From a new social worker at the prison. 147 00:15:34,666 --> 00:15:37,466 He's managed to convince your father that if he's willing... 148 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:40,200 ...to give his blessing to you being adopted... 149 00:15:40,333 --> 00:15:43,566 ...he can't object any longer to you knowing your mother's name... 150 00:15:44,733 --> 00:15:46,533 ...which was Connolly. 151 00:15:48,166 --> 00:15:49,633 Mary Connolly. 152 00:15:49,766 --> 00:15:50,800 Maiden name. 153 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:55,133 Look, would it be possible for you to bring those expressive eyes... 154 00:15:55,266 --> 00:15:58,500 ...round this way so that I get the pleasure of them for a minute? 155 00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:04,033 Would you like to write her name in your life story book? 156 00:16:04,733 --> 00:16:06,233 Go on. 157 00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:34,600 "This is a drawing... 158 00:16:36,300 --> 00:16:42,666 ...I did from memory of the house... 159 00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:46,100 ...where my parents lived... 160 00:16:46,233 --> 00:16:52,633 ...when I was born. 161 00:16:53,266 --> 00:16:59,200 It has five windows... 162 00:16:59,333 --> 00:17:00,766 ...at the front. 163 00:17:01,066 --> 00:17:03,000 Catch the cushion. 164 00:17:03,133 --> 00:17:06,266 The cushion is concentration. 165 00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:08,266 Margery! 166 00:17:09,300 --> 00:17:12,233 -Yes? -The cushion is attention. 167 00:17:12,366 --> 00:17:15,566 Will to succeed. Now, shout out your own name and throw the cushion... 168 00:17:15,700 --> 00:17:18,200 -...to someone else. -Tina. 169 00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:22,533 -Graham! -Margery! 170 00:17:22,666 --> 00:17:24,166 I hate this kind of thing. 171 00:17:24,300 --> 00:17:25,766 Can't hear you, Janet. 172 00:17:26,066 --> 00:17:29,200 She'll be wearing pink pajamas When she comes 173 00:17:29,333 --> 00:17:33,133 She'll be wearing pink pajamas When she comes 174 00:17:33,266 --> 00:17:35,300 She'll be wearing pink pajamas 175 00:17:35,433 --> 00:17:37,000 Wearing pink pajamas 176 00:17:37,333 --> 00:17:41,166 Wearing pink pajamas When she comes 177 00:18:10,333 --> 00:18:11,733 Any children who might.... 178 00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:14,700 I say, might come your way... 179 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,566 ...will almost certainly have been picked on. 180 00:18:17,700 --> 00:18:20,266 Before these sessions are through, every one of you... 181 00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:24,300 ...will have been given the opportunity to know just what that feels like. 182 00:18:26,133 --> 00:18:28,433 Now, sometimes you have a child of 9 or 10... 183 00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:32,666 ...who's stuck emotionally at 2 or 3 because he may have been caught up... 184 00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:35,466 ...in social services' favorite game, Pass the Parcel. 185 00:18:38,233 --> 00:18:41,300 All right. So you can accept the idea of a child... 186 00:18:41,433 --> 00:18:43,733 ...being emotionally stuck as an idea... 187 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:48,666 ...but can you cope with a healthy-looking 10-year-old... 188 00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:51,733 ...who's wetting, soiling, crying, biting one minute... 189 00:18:52,033 --> 00:18:54,066 ...and giggling manically the next? 190 00:18:55,266 --> 00:18:56,400 Empathize. 191 00:18:56,766 --> 00:18:59,000 Feel as the child feels. 192 00:18:59,133 --> 00:19:03,033 Remember, the idea of permanence is too frightening for some children. 193 00:19:03,166 --> 00:19:06,333 Like stepping into the unknown. They've never, ever experienced it. 194 00:19:14,066 --> 00:19:16,266 Always lose one. 195 00:19:17,733 --> 00:19:20,233 In fact, we've lost four. 196 00:19:20,433 --> 00:19:22,266 But not you? 197 00:19:23,533 --> 00:19:25,466 No second thoughts? 198 00:19:26,233 --> 00:19:29,100 -You still like children? -Very much. 199 00:19:29,233 --> 00:19:31,733 I'm not sure I could eat a whole one. 200 00:19:36,433 --> 00:19:38,433 I've sent someone to find him. 201 00:19:40,433 --> 00:19:42,700 Don't expect too much, will you? 202 00:19:57,766 --> 00:19:58,800 If you agree... 203 00:20:04,033 --> 00:20:06,266 ...I'd like to give you a proper home... 204 00:20:07,266 --> 00:20:11,100 ...and look after you. 205 00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:15,100 I think it's time your life was a bit easier... 206 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,700 ...and a bit happier. 207 00:20:25,300 --> 00:20:27,233 Do you understand? 208 00:20:28,566 --> 00:20:32,100 We could think of it as a kind of partnership. 209 00:20:32,233 --> 00:20:35,166 I want a son... 210 00:20:35,300 --> 00:20:37,466 ...and you need a.... 211 00:20:41,333 --> 00:20:43,766 What I mean is, you need somebody... 212 00:20:44,066 --> 00:20:47,433 ...some one person to care about you. 213 00:20:52,566 --> 00:20:56,100 A partnership will only work if it's what you want, James. 214 00:20:56,233 --> 00:20:58,133 Excuse me. 215 00:21:37,733 --> 00:21:39,800 Who do you love most in all the world, Jimmy? 216 00:21:40,100 --> 00:21:41,133 You, Dad. 217 00:21:41,266 --> 00:21:43,233 Always, Jimmy. Promise. Always. 218 00:21:43,366 --> 00:21:45,366 Never break it. Pain of death. 219 00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:46,766 I promise. 220 00:21:51,466 --> 00:21:54,466 I was beginning to think you'd.... 221 00:21:55,200 --> 00:21:58,066 What is it they say? Done a runner? 222 00:22:00,766 --> 00:22:02,100 But you hadn't, had you? 223 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:11,366 Well, I didn't think you'd want more food so I.... 224 00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:14,200 You didn't eat much. 225 00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:17,800 Is that because you're as nervous as I am? 226 00:22:23,333 --> 00:22:24,366 I see. 227 00:22:26,666 --> 00:22:29,066 I suppose that's it really, isn't it? 228 00:22:30,166 --> 00:22:33,700 I've chosen you, but in order for it to be an equal partnership... 229 00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:37,000 ...I'd have to be the person you would choose. 230 00:22:39,233 --> 00:22:41,533 You look after me when I'm old and decrepit. 231 00:22:41,666 --> 00:22:45,000 You do realize that's the only reason I'm doing this, don't you? 232 00:22:49,666 --> 00:22:51,666 What kept you so long in the toilet? 233 00:22:52,666 --> 00:22:54,333 Can't you guess? 234 00:22:56,766 --> 00:22:58,366 Thank you. 235 00:22:59,700 --> 00:23:01,433 Courting? 236 00:23:01,766 --> 00:23:02,800 Are we? 237 00:23:04,533 --> 00:23:05,800 Just a friend, Mrs. Hawkins. 238 00:23:06,466 --> 00:23:10,433 You know you don't think standing there in that clean white shirt fools anybody. 239 00:23:10,566 --> 00:23:14,533 Well, you ought to be out with company and enjoying yourself. 240 00:23:14,666 --> 00:23:16,666 It's only natural. 241 00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:18,600 See you tomorrow, Mrs. Hawkins. 242 00:23:18,733 --> 00:23:22,266 -Yes, I hope so. -Watch your step. 243 00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:26,400 Oh, I'm very careful with steps, you know. 244 00:23:26,533 --> 00:23:30,500 It's a funny thing. I fall down so much. 245 00:23:35,266 --> 00:23:36,733 You haven't told them yet. 246 00:23:38,500 --> 00:23:41,366 If you live in a village, don't tell people things too early. 247 00:23:41,500 --> 00:23:43,166 Cautious bugger. 248 00:23:43,300 --> 00:23:45,233 I have to know.... 249 00:23:45,733 --> 00:23:47,133 Be sure it'll happen. 250 00:23:47,500 --> 00:23:49,700 Nothing's for sure in this life, Grae. 251 00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:53,333 Right now, you're not even a candidate to adopt my stick insect. 252 00:23:54,533 --> 00:23:57,633 -I want to know about your childhood. -Well.... 253 00:23:59,133 --> 00:24:01,700 I have the reckoning up to do. You know, it's fiddly work. 254 00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:05,066 -I have to concentrate. -I'll wait. 255 00:24:05,366 --> 00:24:07,400 You'll have to bear with me. 256 00:24:12,666 --> 00:24:14,233 Well.... 257 00:24:15,033 --> 00:24:16,166 There's not much to tell. 258 00:24:17,166 --> 00:24:21,000 I had a spotlessly sanitized childhood. 259 00:24:21,266 --> 00:24:24,600 ...with a change of Aertex support systems every other day. 260 00:24:24,733 --> 00:24:26,800 Leave the light relief to me, Grae. 261 00:24:27,100 --> 00:24:29,233 Just the facts. Your mum and dad... 262 00:24:29,666 --> 00:24:32,533 ...from the point of view of their only child. 263 00:24:38,666 --> 00:24:41,266 They were always touching each other. 264 00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:45,733 I cannot remember when I first began to notice the looks they exchanged... 265 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:49,700 ...full of private meaning. 266 00:24:50,633 --> 00:24:52,800 Or the constant touching. 267 00:24:54,500 --> 00:24:57,433 Not that I lacked.... I mean, they touched me. 268 00:24:57,566 --> 00:25:01,333 Of course, they touched me too. I don't think I lacked physical contact. 269 00:25:01,466 --> 00:25:03,033 When? 270 00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:08,600 -What? -When did they touch you? 271 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:12,166 Whenever it was necessary. 272 00:25:12,300 --> 00:25:15,566 Whenever they felt like it. 273 00:25:16,033 --> 00:25:17,800 Not often then. 274 00:25:18,433 --> 00:25:19,600 And as a teenager? 275 00:25:20,466 --> 00:25:23,266 Not at all would be my guess. 276 00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:29,366 I was rather a disappointment to them. 277 00:25:31,366 --> 00:25:34,566 Even when I went disco dancing on Saturday night.... 278 00:25:34,700 --> 00:25:37,766 He's polishing his brothel creepers. 279 00:25:38,066 --> 00:25:39,666 They're just shoes, Dad. 280 00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:41,066 He's a one, our Graham. 281 00:25:42,100 --> 00:25:43,400 Isn't he a one, dear? 282 00:25:43,533 --> 00:25:45,566 He's always been a one. 283 00:25:45,700 --> 00:25:47,766 Let's have a look at you then. 284 00:25:52,233 --> 00:25:54,600 He'll break a few hearts tonight. 285 00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:57,633 I went. I didn't dance. 286 00:25:58,466 --> 00:26:01,800 My parents never understood that one had to be part of a group. 287 00:26:02,266 --> 00:26:05,633 Either a couple of opposite sexes... 288 00:26:05,766 --> 00:26:09,333 ...or a small group of the-- Of the same sex. 289 00:26:10,100 --> 00:26:14,033 After a while, I stopped going inside the disco. I did crosswords in the car... 290 00:26:14,166 --> 00:26:17,233 ...then endured a cross-examination when I got home. 291 00:26:17,366 --> 00:26:18,400 Hi, Mum. Dad. 292 00:26:18,533 --> 00:26:20,033 Did you speak to anyone? 293 00:26:20,166 --> 00:26:22,300 -Any nice girl? -You could bring home to tea... 294 00:26:22,433 --> 00:26:25,133 -...to meet your mum and dad? -Did you enjoy yourself? 295 00:26:25,266 --> 00:26:27,500 You're only young once. 296 00:26:28,533 --> 00:26:31,466 When I was in my 30's, my parents decided... 297 00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:36,466 ...that I'd missed my moment so I was allowed to stop going... 298 00:26:37,100 --> 00:26:38,600 ...to town on Saturday nights. 299 00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:41,733 And then she died? 300 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,233 You make it sound sudden. 301 00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:48,533 It took five years. 302 00:26:50,766 --> 00:26:52,566 I suppose I grew up during that time. 303 00:26:54,700 --> 00:26:57,166 Rather a delayed growing. 304 00:26:59,033 --> 00:27:04,333 I arranged the funeral and Dad wasn't making much sense. 305 00:27:05,233 --> 00:27:10,400 His hands were like injured birds looking for a safe place to roost. 306 00:27:13,366 --> 00:27:17,066 So I took her place... 307 00:27:17,233 --> 00:27:19,100 ...in the kitchen... 308 00:27:19,433 --> 00:27:21,433 ...behind the counter. 309 00:27:29,166 --> 00:27:33,066 Mum and Dad had never seemed separated from each other. 310 00:27:34,300 --> 00:27:36,300 But he and I were separated. 311 00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:40,266 Dad, please. 312 00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:58,400 Please, don't. 313 00:28:01,133 --> 00:28:03,033 It's all right, Dad. 314 00:28:04,500 --> 00:28:06,233 You'll be all right. 315 00:28:07,266 --> 00:28:08,333 Come on. 316 00:28:08,466 --> 00:28:10,500 Dad, I'm here. 317 00:28:23,666 --> 00:28:26,133 Oh, it's a scrapbook really, isn't it? 318 00:28:26,266 --> 00:28:29,566 Well, that's one way of describing it, but for obvious reasons... 319 00:28:30,166 --> 00:28:33,433 ...we don't call what, with a help from us... 320 00:28:33,566 --> 00:28:36,533 ...the children put together about themselves scrapbooks. 321 00:28:39,233 --> 00:28:42,200 No, no, mine's just a photograph album. 322 00:28:42,333 --> 00:28:43,566 That's not even a scrapbook. 323 00:28:43,700 --> 00:28:45,533 Who took the pictures? 324 00:28:45,666 --> 00:28:46,766 My dad had a timer. 325 00:28:47,066 --> 00:28:50,100 He'd set it and then run around and join us. 326 00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:55,166 This one's overexposed. 327 00:28:55,700 --> 00:28:58,200 You look like three ghosts. 328 00:28:59,533 --> 00:29:01,800 We were a very ordinary family. 329 00:29:02,100 --> 00:29:06,100 I think it probably takes flair and initiative to be a ghost. 330 00:29:06,233 --> 00:29:10,033 You might have been ordinary once, but you're not now. 331 00:29:17,333 --> 00:29:20,433 Not many unmarried men want to adopt. 332 00:29:23,366 --> 00:29:25,466 Have you always lived in the same house? 333 00:29:26,466 --> 00:29:28,200 Afraid so. 334 00:29:28,366 --> 00:29:30,200 And gone to the same school? 335 00:29:30,333 --> 00:29:33,133 Two schools. Primary and comprehensive. 336 00:29:33,466 --> 00:29:35,300 I went to six schools so far. 337 00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:39,600 I would've thought you'd won a scholarship to a private school. 338 00:29:39,733 --> 00:29:41,500 No, I told you, no flair. 339 00:29:44,100 --> 00:29:46,666 What sort of things did you do when you were my age? 340 00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:48,700 Well, I kept my head down, I suppose. 341 00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:53,166 I told you, nothing very exciting. 342 00:29:54,266 --> 00:29:56,733 Is what's in there exciting? 343 00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:12,033 It's more disturbing than exciting. 344 00:30:12,166 --> 00:30:14,666 That's what they say I am: disturbed. 345 00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:17,033 What do you say? 346 00:30:22,233 --> 00:30:25,066 I like this one. It's you when you were my age. 347 00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:29,166 You were on a beach. You look like a right tearaway. 348 00:30:41,666 --> 00:30:43,400 May I see it? 349 00:30:50,566 --> 00:30:53,500 It was on holiday alone with my father. 350 00:30:54,033 --> 00:30:57,700 It was the only time he and I were ever alone for any length of time. 351 00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:00,466 Only time he and I were ever really close. 352 00:31:01,666 --> 00:31:02,733 I'm sorry. 353 00:31:03,033 --> 00:31:05,500 I had forgotten about the picture. 354 00:31:06,733 --> 00:31:09,200 I really am very sorry. 355 00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:15,300 We laughed a lot that week. 356 00:31:15,433 --> 00:31:16,800 I suppose it was the feeling... 357 00:31:17,100 --> 00:31:20,566 ...that we were doing something secret and slightly wicked. 358 00:31:20,766 --> 00:31:22,566 I felt important... 359 00:31:22,700 --> 00:31:24,766 ...almost needed. 360 00:31:29,566 --> 00:31:31,066 Listen. 361 00:31:32,266 --> 00:31:34,466 West Indian Sea. 362 00:31:37,200 --> 00:31:41,000 We'll take it home to remind us of the fun we had. 363 00:31:46,033 --> 00:31:48,533 It was the best time of my life. 364 00:31:49,033 --> 00:31:51,433 It was the happiest I've ever been. 365 00:32:06,433 --> 00:32:10,033 -I cried. -So I heard. 366 00:32:12,700 --> 00:32:15,366 Isn't it usual to phone before you visit? 367 00:32:15,500 --> 00:32:17,733 Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. 368 00:32:18,133 --> 00:32:21,100 I like to catch people unawares. 369 00:32:22,466 --> 00:32:26,633 -Anyway, there's no point now. -Why? 370 00:32:27,033 --> 00:32:28,700 I told you. 371 00:32:30,566 --> 00:32:34,366 I cried in front of the child I was hoping to adopt, and his-- 372 00:32:34,500 --> 00:32:37,000 And his-- What's it called? His key worker. 373 00:32:37,233 --> 00:32:38,633 Best thing you could've done. 374 00:32:39,233 --> 00:32:41,400 Now, they're both crazy about you... 375 00:32:41,533 --> 00:32:43,566 ...which they certainly weren't before. 376 00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:47,700 Better start getting yourself prepared for a weekend visit. 377 00:32:52,433 --> 00:32:55,666 It's been suggested that I put you in a home. 378 00:33:00,066 --> 00:33:04,000 They say that if I'm right about what you feel for me... 379 00:33:04,133 --> 00:33:07,300 ...if you can still feel emotions, and I don't know, Dad. 380 00:33:07,433 --> 00:33:11,066 See, I just don't know, but if you can... 381 00:33:12,700 --> 00:33:16,000 ...the sense of being beholden to me... 382 00:33:16,133 --> 00:33:19,233 ...must be very painful for you. 383 00:33:22,066 --> 00:33:25,333 I just can't be sure about any of this, can I? 384 00:33:27,133 --> 00:33:31,500 I dearly wish you had some way of giving me your opinion. 385 00:33:42,300 --> 00:33:44,533 I will get your breakfast. 386 00:34:04,366 --> 00:34:06,266 Can I have a word? 387 00:34:08,333 --> 00:34:11,633 His father's had another stroke and been taken to the hospital. 388 00:34:11,766 --> 00:34:15,266 I guess your first visit is gonna be delayed for a couple of weeks. 389 00:34:48,166 --> 00:34:49,433 Wait! Wait! 390 00:34:52,766 --> 00:34:55,066 I am waiting. We stopped. 391 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:56,600 We're here. 392 00:35:00,066 --> 00:35:04,366 -Stage fright? -If you like. 393 00:35:04,500 --> 00:35:06,033 I've been here before. 394 00:35:06,466 --> 00:35:07,800 I know. 395 00:35:08,100 --> 00:35:10,466 But this is important, Jimbo. 396 00:35:10,700 --> 00:35:13,000 And I think it's what you want. 397 00:35:15,100 --> 00:35:17,200 Look, he's there waiting for you. 398 00:35:18,166 --> 00:35:20,233 Get out of the car. 399 00:35:24,233 --> 00:35:26,600 I'll be back to collect you after tea. 400 00:35:35,766 --> 00:35:37,366 Hello. 401 00:35:38,366 --> 00:35:39,666 Hello. 402 00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:45,633 First off, I thought we'd look around, get used to the geography. 403 00:35:45,766 --> 00:35:48,533 In there is my house, but.... 404 00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:53,333 On this side is the post office. 405 00:35:53,466 --> 00:35:54,666 All right. It's okay. Bye. 406 00:35:54,800 --> 00:35:57,200 Hello, Mrs. George. 407 00:35:58,533 --> 00:36:00,200 Thank you. 408 00:36:01,733 --> 00:36:04,066 This is Lynn, my helper. 409 00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:05,666 Lynn, James. 410 00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:07,333 Hello. 411 00:36:09,133 --> 00:36:11,333 We'll go into the house now. 412 00:36:13,333 --> 00:36:15,200 It's not very big. 413 00:36:16,033 --> 00:36:17,166 Living room. 414 00:36:17,300 --> 00:36:22,333 I thought we'd have tea in here today, though the kitchen's more usual. 415 00:36:22,466 --> 00:36:25,166 Living room, said that. 416 00:36:25,300 --> 00:36:28,433 And kitchen. 417 00:36:29,233 --> 00:36:32,166 You'll be seeing quite a lot of that. Then we can go upstairs. 418 00:36:32,300 --> 00:36:35,033 There might be something upstairs that would interest you. 419 00:36:37,633 --> 00:36:39,400 Watch your step. 420 00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:48,533 It's your room. 421 00:37:48,466 --> 00:37:49,533 Where is your father? 422 00:37:51,700 --> 00:37:54,033 He got sicker and needed to be somewhere... 423 00:37:54,166 --> 00:37:56,366 ...where they could give him proper medical care. 424 00:37:56,633 --> 00:37:57,666 In a hospital? 425 00:38:00,233 --> 00:38:02,666 Well, yes. Hospital, yes. 426 00:38:03,066 --> 00:38:05,533 Was he sent there because of me? 427 00:38:08,700 --> 00:38:12,100 Would they let me come here if he hadn't been put away? 428 00:38:13,566 --> 00:38:15,366 Possibly not. 429 00:38:15,500 --> 00:38:18,500 Though the number of single men who apply to adopt... 430 00:38:18,633 --> 00:38:21,300 ...can be counted on the fingers of one foot. 431 00:38:21,433 --> 00:38:22,700 You only have to look across this table... 432 00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:25,700 ...to see they must be scraping the bottom of the barrel. 433 00:38:27,566 --> 00:38:29,266 Overdone it, haven't I? 434 00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:35,333 You know, they call this the honeymoon period. 435 00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:41,400 Paper hats? 436 00:38:41,700 --> 00:38:43,200 No. 437 00:38:44,266 --> 00:38:45,733 Perhaps not. 438 00:38:48,566 --> 00:38:51,200 Have you thought yet what you'd like to call me? 439 00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:57,600 I thought Graham would be best if you feel you can manage that. 440 00:39:05,433 --> 00:39:08,500 -There is a chance. -Yeah, but look, don't raise your hopes. 441 00:39:08,633 --> 00:39:12,566 Round and round the garden Like a teddy bear 442 00:39:18,366 --> 00:39:22,600 Round and round the garden Like a teddy bear 443 00:39:22,733 --> 00:39:26,566 One step, two step Tickle you under there 444 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:32,266 -It's not my fault. It's your own fault. -When do you see him? 445 00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:35,366 -When do you spend time with him? -I see him as often as I can. 446 00:39:52,733 --> 00:39:55,000 Maureen, I'm Graham Holt. 447 00:39:56,700 --> 00:39:58,733 Well, James has decided-- 448 00:39:59,033 --> 00:40:01,466 Elected to remain in the car. 449 00:40:02,133 --> 00:40:03,466 We've had a bit of a row, see. 450 00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:07,033 I don't think he wants me poking in his past even under his supervision. 451 00:40:07,166 --> 00:40:10,400 Supervision he's now withholding by sulking in the car, right? 452 00:40:10,533 --> 00:40:13,333 Always difficult to know what to do for the best, isn't it? 453 00:40:13,466 --> 00:40:17,666 -Always. -You were his key worker? 454 00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:19,400 His housemother. 455 00:40:25,200 --> 00:40:28,400 -Ever mention his real mother? -No. 456 00:40:28,533 --> 00:40:31,333 I've been warned not to ask about her yet. 457 00:40:31,466 --> 00:40:34,133 Or ever, would be my advice. 458 00:40:34,433 --> 00:40:37,500 Tell you about the day I had him pinned to the floor, screaming? 459 00:40:37,633 --> 00:40:39,300 He spat. He bit. 460 00:40:39,533 --> 00:40:43,433 If I'd been wearing makeup, he probably would've done himself in. 461 00:40:43,566 --> 00:40:45,800 Been told about his constant running away? 462 00:40:46,100 --> 00:40:48,333 Always hiding in dark holes. 463 00:40:48,466 --> 00:40:50,700 He's attempted suicide twice. 464 00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:53,633 Yes, I've been given all the details. 465 00:41:14,133 --> 00:41:15,766 Over here! 466 00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:18,333 Look at the state of him. 467 00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:21,766 Get off! No! No! 468 00:41:22,066 --> 00:41:23,400 Get off! 469 00:41:32,700 --> 00:41:35,233 Tell him I'm hurt, he wouldn't get out of the car... 470 00:41:35,366 --> 00:41:37,166 ...after all we went through. 471 00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:42,666 If he's allowing you to stand in for his real dad... 472 00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:44,466 ...you must be special. 473 00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:46,766 -Still in prison, I suppose? -Yes. 474 00:41:47,066 --> 00:41:49,266 Before everything's final... 475 00:41:50,066 --> 00:41:51,466 ...we'll be going to meet him. 476 00:41:52,766 --> 00:41:55,100 And whose idea was that? 477 00:41:55,433 --> 00:41:57,733 Well, James'. 478 00:41:58,033 --> 00:41:59,133 Thought it might be. 479 00:41:59,266 --> 00:42:01,266 -But the social worker-- -Oh, yes. 480 00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:02,700 How old is she, 14? 481 00:42:04,133 --> 00:42:06,033 You're being used... 482 00:42:06,166 --> 00:42:08,066 ...by a manipulative little boy... 483 00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:10,800 ...who wants to get another glimpse of his dad. 484 00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:15,133 You'll never get to adopt him. And believe me, you're well out of it. 485 00:42:15,266 --> 00:42:19,200 The moment those two meet again, you'll be out on your ear. 486 00:42:34,766 --> 00:42:36,366 How come you used to like her... 487 00:42:36,500 --> 00:42:39,500 ...when women tend not to be your cup of tea? 488 00:42:39,733 --> 00:42:41,366 Perhaps she's a bit of a les. 489 00:42:43,300 --> 00:42:45,000 -Sorry? -Lesbian. Butch. 490 00:42:45,133 --> 00:42:48,300 Wasn't she wearing leather and studs like she hadn't slept for a week? 491 00:42:50,500 --> 00:42:53,400 No. She was a bit untidy, I suppose, but-- 492 00:42:53,666 --> 00:42:58,000 There you are then, aren't you? Not a proper woman, that's what. 493 00:42:58,466 --> 00:43:01,166 What constitutes a proper woman then? 494 00:43:04,500 --> 00:43:05,600 Let me out! 495 00:43:07,433 --> 00:43:08,733 Tits and silk and frills! 496 00:43:09,266 --> 00:43:10,500 Makeup that stinks! 497 00:43:10,633 --> 00:43:14,266 And legs that shoot apart the minute you touch them with your little finger! 498 00:43:14,700 --> 00:43:17,266 Get off! Get off. 499 00:43:23,166 --> 00:43:27,033 You could've turned the radio off, you know, if it was bothering you. 500 00:43:27,166 --> 00:43:28,266 Nothing bothers me. 501 00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:30,466 It's your radio. 502 00:44:12,400 --> 00:44:13,533 Slow down. 503 00:44:13,666 --> 00:44:18,066 Didn't they warn you what being a substitute parent was like? 504 00:44:19,033 --> 00:44:20,733 I suppose I need help. 505 00:44:21,033 --> 00:44:23,066 Who doesn't? 506 00:44:39,266 --> 00:44:41,766 Honeymoon's over! 507 00:44:51,266 --> 00:44:54,800 It really is very good of you. I was going to do it myself. 508 00:44:57,366 --> 00:45:01,233 Center of attraction at Harvest Festival. 509 00:45:01,366 --> 00:45:03,633 Geraniums, chrysanthemums. 510 00:45:03,766 --> 00:45:05,733 Michaelmas daisies. 511 00:45:06,033 --> 00:45:08,466 It looks better now, look. It looks better, doesn't it? 512 00:45:08,700 --> 00:45:11,333 Be with you in a moment, please. 513 00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:15,033 I've been given three opinions so far of what should be done. 514 00:45:15,166 --> 00:45:18,166 -Putting out a suggestion box. -What were they? 515 00:45:18,300 --> 00:45:20,800 None of them included fostering with a view to adoption. 516 00:45:21,100 --> 00:45:24,033 -Where is he now? -Still in his room. 517 00:46:41,800 --> 00:46:45,200 -You had his grandparents' address. -Yes, but I can't let you have it. 518 00:46:45,333 --> 00:46:47,000 They don't want to be known. 519 00:46:47,133 --> 00:46:49,800 You said I had to see as many people in his book as I could. 520 00:46:50,100 --> 00:46:51,766 As many as will let you see them. 521 00:46:52,433 --> 00:46:55,066 I need to know. In time, he'll need to know. 522 00:46:55,200 --> 00:46:58,200 When that time comes, I'll need to be able to tell him. 523 00:47:01,433 --> 00:47:02,500 Growing up, aren't you? 524 00:47:06,533 --> 00:47:09,366 Remember, he's your great-grandfather. 525 00:47:09,500 --> 00:47:11,700 He doesn't know we're coming. 526 00:47:13,533 --> 00:47:15,233 That would be him. 527 00:47:15,366 --> 00:47:18,566 I'd better talk to him first, and then call you. 528 00:47:26,100 --> 00:47:31,066 She came here to stay, you know, very often when she was a little girl. 529 00:47:31,200 --> 00:47:33,333 I never saw your dad. 530 00:47:33,466 --> 00:47:36,233 Just you. Just once. 531 00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:40,333 Oh, you look just like her. 532 00:47:40,466 --> 00:47:42,633 She used to write, regular. 533 00:47:42,766 --> 00:47:44,066 Never miss. 534 00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:45,366 And I wrote back. 535 00:47:47,133 --> 00:47:48,666 Until.... 536 00:47:49,500 --> 00:47:52,600 Suddenly she wasn't known at that address. 537 00:47:53,400 --> 00:47:55,500 Oh, we were very close. 538 00:47:55,766 --> 00:47:59,066 Always very close. 539 00:47:59,200 --> 00:48:02,500 That time when she stopped writing... 540 00:48:02,633 --> 00:48:04,566 ...I needed someone to.... 541 00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:10,666 I blamed her. 542 00:48:12,566 --> 00:48:16,166 I thought she didn't want to be bothered. 543 00:48:18,300 --> 00:48:20,700 There's things of hers... 544 00:48:21,000 --> 00:48:24,200 ...photos and such in a box in that bureau. 545 00:48:24,333 --> 00:48:26,266 You can look if you like. 546 00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:30,433 Take what you want. 547 00:48:35,566 --> 00:48:37,433 Go and see if he's all right. 548 00:49:10,033 --> 00:49:13,100 Never break it. Pain of death. 549 00:49:44,133 --> 00:49:45,366 Want the radio? 550 00:49:48,566 --> 00:49:50,333 You okay? 551 00:49:51,300 --> 00:49:53,366 Can we see your father next weekend? 552 00:49:54,566 --> 00:49:56,400 If you like. 553 00:50:04,700 --> 00:50:06,800 He could have another stroke anytime now. 554 00:50:07,100 --> 00:50:11,500 And it's most unlikely he'll ever be allowed home. 555 00:50:11,633 --> 00:50:15,300 Oh, well, I am sorry. It is bad news. 556 00:50:15,433 --> 00:50:17,500 And he doesn't seem too unhappy here with us. 557 00:50:17,633 --> 00:50:19,500 No, no, it's hard to tell really... 558 00:50:19,633 --> 00:50:23,000 ...but it seems he's happy here as he ever was at home. 559 00:51:37,133 --> 00:51:39,666 I miss you so much. 560 00:51:45,566 --> 00:51:46,666 We need a tent... 561 00:51:46,800 --> 00:51:51,066 ...a double and single sleeping bag and cookery pans. 562 00:51:51,766 --> 00:51:53,600 What discount do you give for cash? 563 00:51:53,733 --> 00:51:56,500 My Uncle Reuben used to go camping a lot... 564 00:51:56,633 --> 00:52:01,066 ...until his hernia made rubbing little sticks together too painful. 565 00:52:04,366 --> 00:52:07,466 Time you started being a bit more masterful, Grae. 566 00:52:07,600 --> 00:52:10,733 I'm not gonna be around to nursemaid you forever, you know? 567 00:52:11,033 --> 00:52:13,566 I'd better go see what he's buying. 568 00:52:15,066 --> 00:52:17,600 Grae, if he gets you practicing knots... 569 00:52:17,733 --> 00:52:21,600 ...just remember, untying them again is the hard part. 570 00:52:38,400 --> 00:52:39,800 It's good. Come in. 571 00:52:40,100 --> 00:52:41,533 You are freezing. 572 00:52:41,666 --> 00:52:44,433 -I'm not. Do you wanna come in? -I don't wanna come in. 573 00:52:44,566 --> 00:52:46,066 -Why not? -I'm cold right here. 574 00:52:46,200 --> 00:52:47,266 Go on. 575 00:52:47,400 --> 00:52:49,533 -I was getting frozen watching you. -I don't. 576 00:52:49,666 --> 00:52:51,733 -Are you sure? -Yeah. 577 00:52:53,066 --> 00:52:55,766 I thought you'd lose your temper with me. 578 00:52:57,533 --> 00:53:01,566 Particularly over that muddle with the lining. I've always been clumsy. 579 00:53:03,366 --> 00:53:05,533 Everyone's got to learn. 580 00:53:07,266 --> 00:53:09,033 If you don't turn the sausage over... 581 00:53:09,166 --> 00:53:12,000 ...it'll be raw on one side and burnt on the other. 582 00:53:16,366 --> 00:53:19,366 Funny, I've always thought of tent people as being a bit odd. 583 00:53:19,500 --> 00:53:25,400 Weird, even. Overgrown Boy Scouts or leftover hippies. 584 00:53:26,066 --> 00:53:27,433 Tent people aren't odd. 585 00:53:27,566 --> 00:53:29,400 You ought to learn survival. 586 00:53:29,533 --> 00:53:31,633 All sorts of things. 587 00:53:31,766 --> 00:53:33,700 Eat worms if you have to. 588 00:53:38,666 --> 00:53:40,800 No. Really? 589 00:53:41,100 --> 00:53:44,633 Then you get your night vision and you can go on ahead. 590 00:53:44,766 --> 00:53:46,600 You know a lot about it. 591 00:53:46,733 --> 00:53:49,033 I had a good teacher. 592 00:53:52,600 --> 00:53:56,266 There's a hole in the bottom of the sea 593 00:53:56,400 --> 00:53:59,533 There's a hole in the bottom of the sea 594 00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:02,300 There's a hole, there's a hole 595 00:54:02,433 --> 00:54:06,333 There's a hole in the bottom of the sea 596 00:55:19,400 --> 00:55:22,500 If you'd waited, we could all have gone together. 597 00:55:23,300 --> 00:55:26,466 It was his school holidays. I had to do something with him. 598 00:55:26,600 --> 00:55:30,533 No fun for me having him for a full week on my own. 599 00:55:31,333 --> 00:55:33,000 Terrible room, horrible food... 600 00:55:33,133 --> 00:55:36,033 ...and do you know what's it's like trying to keep him amused? 601 00:55:50,133 --> 00:55:52,100 Were you cold? 602 00:55:54,766 --> 00:55:56,366 You talked in your sleep. 603 00:55:57,300 --> 00:55:59,400 What did I say? 604 00:55:59,666 --> 00:56:01,000 Nothing sensible. 605 00:56:01,133 --> 00:56:03,166 Just words. 606 00:56:41,200 --> 00:56:44,666 -What have you done to yourself? -A branch hit me. 607 00:56:48,366 --> 00:56:51,500 It looks painful. Just missed your eye. 608 00:56:52,433 --> 00:56:54,800 Must have given you a hell of a twang. 609 00:56:56,400 --> 00:57:01,066 You go get the first aid kit from the tent and put some antiseptic cream on it. 610 00:57:02,000 --> 00:57:04,633 Kiss it better, please? 611 00:57:10,566 --> 00:57:12,800 Do it properly. 612 00:57:14,466 --> 00:57:16,266 How's properly? 613 00:57:16,400 --> 00:57:17,633 Longer. Harder. 614 00:57:17,766 --> 00:57:21,366 Got to be a long kiss to make it better. 615 00:57:37,666 --> 00:57:39,500 Is that better? 616 00:57:44,466 --> 00:57:46,600 Do you love me? 617 00:57:49,333 --> 00:57:51,300 Yes, very much. 618 00:57:52,600 --> 00:57:55,433 Too much for my own good, I expect. 619 00:58:07,333 --> 00:58:09,433 Were you testing me? 620 00:58:10,066 --> 00:58:13,000 I do test people sometimes. 621 00:58:39,700 --> 00:58:43,266 Now I know why the skylark sings like she does. 622 00:58:46,333 --> 00:58:49,033 -Where's the village? -Village? 623 00:58:50,500 --> 00:58:52,433 Over that hill. 624 00:58:55,033 --> 00:58:57,333 The moon moves further away from the Earth... 625 00:58:57,466 --> 00:59:00,033 ...by about a foot every 20 years. 626 00:59:00,166 --> 00:59:02,266 Was it something we said? 627 00:59:27,533 --> 00:59:29,266 What does big brother Eddie say... 628 00:59:29,400 --> 00:59:32,333 ...about you interesting yourself in little boys? 629 00:59:33,333 --> 00:59:36,533 It's not a question of little boys, Uncle Turpin, there's only one. 630 00:59:36,666 --> 00:59:41,266 Jamie came after Dad had his first stroke so Dad couldn't voice an opinion. 631 00:59:50,100 --> 00:59:51,266 You picked a right sulker. 632 00:59:51,400 --> 00:59:54,333 I doubt even Everton Mints could put a smile on that fizzog. 633 00:59:54,600 --> 00:59:57,600 Jamie wanted to meet you. He's catching up on my family. 634 00:59:57,733 --> 00:59:59,733 Is that right? 635 01:00:00,366 --> 01:00:02,533 I'm sorry I didn't get to your mother's funeral. 636 01:00:02,666 --> 01:00:04,233 I were a bit indisposed myself. 637 01:00:04,366 --> 01:00:06,200 You and she were never very close. 638 01:00:06,333 --> 01:00:08,666 -I couldn't stand the woman. -Why not? 639 01:00:11,133 --> 01:00:12,566 It speaks. 640 01:00:18,200 --> 01:00:21,466 It not only utters, it asks bloody, cheeky questions. 641 01:00:21,600 --> 01:00:24,100 Seemed a fair question to me. 642 01:00:26,600 --> 01:00:29,800 It was all that lovey-dovey stuff that used to sicken me. 643 01:00:30,100 --> 01:00:32,066 They were a devoted couple. They showed it. 644 01:00:32,200 --> 01:00:34,700 You mean she convinced him that she'd go to pieces... 645 01:00:35,000 --> 01:00:39,066 ...if he strayed even as far as the end of the garden to do a widdle on his own. 646 01:00:40,133 --> 01:00:41,333 Does this one cry? 647 01:00:41,466 --> 01:00:43,566 -Not as far as I know. -Pity. 648 01:00:43,700 --> 01:00:45,800 I like watching little boys cry. 649 01:00:46,200 --> 01:00:48,500 Kept me attending school regular, did that. 650 01:00:49,200 --> 01:00:52,533 Your grandma used to see me to the gate with me dinner money on Monday... 651 01:00:52,666 --> 01:00:55,733 ...and she'd say to me, "See how many you can upset... 652 01:00:56,433 --> 01:00:59,066 ...and don't be late home." 653 01:01:00,600 --> 01:01:03,000 Hadn't you better forgive him... 654 01:01:04,266 --> 01:01:07,233 ...before he dies on you and it's too late. 655 01:01:08,633 --> 01:01:11,600 Always did reckon you took after your mother... 656 01:01:11,733 --> 01:01:14,200 ...even though I had her worked out all wrong. 657 01:01:16,266 --> 01:01:19,233 It weren't her that didn't want kids. It were him. 658 01:01:19,366 --> 01:01:20,533 Him. 659 01:01:20,666 --> 01:01:23,700 Couldn't bring himself to poke a fire properly. 660 01:01:25,766 --> 01:01:28,533 Something to do with the war. I don't know. 661 01:01:29,800 --> 01:01:32,666 Well, that will be why he was always a bit cool with you. 662 01:01:35,100 --> 01:01:38,766 There's a log in the hole In the bottom of the sea 663 01:01:39,066 --> 01:01:41,600 There's a log in the hole In the bottom of the sea 664 01:01:44,333 --> 01:01:46,600 -There's a log, there's a log -Log 665 01:01:46,733 --> 01:01:50,533 -There's a log in the bottom of the sea -There's a log in the bottom of the sea 666 01:01:50,666 --> 01:01:53,500 -There's a limb on the log... -There's a limb on the log... 667 01:01:53,633 --> 01:01:56,000 -...in the hole in the bottom of sea -...in the hole in the bottom of sea 668 01:02:32,700 --> 01:02:35,100 Bags first pee! 669 01:03:33,500 --> 01:03:35,733 I'll just give my bike a bit of an exercise, okay? 670 01:03:36,033 --> 01:03:38,466 Well, don't be long. I'll put the kettle on. 671 01:04:18,100 --> 01:04:19,200 Yeah! 672 01:04:27,366 --> 01:04:31,100 --bottom of the sea There's a hole in the bottom of the sea 673 01:04:34,733 --> 01:04:37,633 Take your breath. Take a breath before you drink. 674 01:04:44,066 --> 01:04:46,066 I have a letter for you. 675 01:04:51,733 --> 01:04:53,366 From your father. 676 01:05:03,200 --> 01:05:05,266 He wrote to me too. 677 01:05:07,033 --> 01:05:08,700 He wished us luck. 678 01:05:12,566 --> 01:05:16,300 He referred to you as Jimmy. I didn't think you liked to be called that. 679 01:05:43,500 --> 01:05:46,666 And you want to read your letter in private, I expect. 680 01:05:54,266 --> 01:05:55,800 Perhaps you're right. 681 01:05:56,100 --> 01:05:58,366 Why not read it in your room? 682 01:06:02,400 --> 01:06:04,366 I should be with you when you read it. 683 01:06:04,500 --> 01:06:08,466 I know it's private, but if it upsets you, I want to be close by. 684 01:06:10,766 --> 01:06:13,400 Get out of my way, please. 685 01:06:48,066 --> 01:06:49,533 Dear Jimmy... 686 01:06:49,666 --> 01:06:52,733 ...they tell me that there is someone who wishes to adopt you... 687 01:06:53,033 --> 01:06:54,666 ...and that they trust this man... 688 01:06:54,800 --> 01:06:57,400 ...and you seem to get on well with him. 689 01:06:58,133 --> 01:07:02,100 In ideal world, Jimmy, my love, we would be together. 690 01:07:02,233 --> 01:07:05,233 No one would stop me from being your father. 691 01:07:06,600 --> 01:07:08,300 Never show weakness, Jimmy. 692 01:07:09,433 --> 01:07:12,333 If people sense it, they just take what they want from you. 693 01:07:13,500 --> 01:07:15,566 Then they disappear. 694 01:07:23,700 --> 01:07:27,800 Please, Jimmy, you must understand that none of what's happened is your fault. 695 01:07:28,100 --> 01:07:31,333 You're not to blame, Jimmy. Please remember that. 696 01:07:31,466 --> 01:07:36,800 I'm the one at fault, the one who's failed his most sacred duty to be a good father. 697 01:07:37,433 --> 01:07:41,533 One day, when you're old enough to understand what forgiveness is... 698 01:07:41,666 --> 01:07:44,633 ...I will need all you can spare. 699 01:07:45,400 --> 01:07:48,100 I love you most. Always, Jimmy. 700 01:07:48,233 --> 01:07:50,466 Promise, always. 701 01:07:50,600 --> 01:07:52,533 Your father. 702 01:08:07,600 --> 01:08:09,600 Will you come home now? It's late. 703 01:08:15,033 --> 01:08:16,466 Come inside. 704 01:08:16,600 --> 01:08:20,533 -You cannot stay out here all night! -Get off me! 705 01:08:21,366 --> 01:08:23,166 Get off! 706 01:08:23,366 --> 01:08:25,100 Anger scares me. 707 01:08:25,233 --> 01:08:29,133 It's an illness, and we don't have to look far to see who I've caught it from. 708 01:08:47,666 --> 01:08:51,166 Jealousy cripples people, Jamie. It makes them behave badly. 709 01:08:51,300 --> 01:08:54,733 But we can't allow everything to fall apart because you've heard from your-- 710 01:08:56,300 --> 01:08:59,766 If I say I understand how you feel, that's just words, because I don't know. 711 01:09:00,066 --> 01:09:03,233 I haven't read your letter, but I want to understand what you feel. 712 01:09:03,366 --> 01:09:07,133 I want to know what you think about while you stand there watching me. 713 01:09:08,100 --> 01:09:10,633 All I can say is, Jamie, unless you can speak to me... 714 01:09:10,766 --> 01:09:15,200 ...unless you say something, unless you can share something, I don't know. 715 01:09:22,400 --> 01:09:23,766 There is food if you're hungry. 716 01:09:24,066 --> 01:09:28,100 I could make you a sandwich. Tea seems rather a long time ago. 717 01:09:28,233 --> 01:09:30,266 I have a father. 718 01:09:32,500 --> 01:09:37,300 Just because he's in prison doesn't make anyone else my father. 719 01:09:38,200 --> 01:09:41,733 His letter doesn't say anything about us going to see him in prison. 720 01:09:42,033 --> 01:09:43,800 You can't adopt me unless I see him first. 721 01:09:44,100 --> 01:09:46,166 You know that, don't you? 722 01:09:47,066 --> 01:09:50,233 I had realized that was part of the bargain you were willing to make. 723 01:09:51,100 --> 01:09:53,200 There is something more in this adoption... 724 01:09:53,333 --> 01:09:55,466 ...than a visit to your father, isn't there? 725 01:10:05,133 --> 01:10:06,700 Are you sure you want me to read it? 726 01:10:07,733 --> 01:10:11,100 Wouldn't it be best to wait and think about it for a while? 727 01:10:11,233 --> 01:10:16,466 It's only fair you should understand why you can't ever take his place. 728 01:10:35,533 --> 01:10:38,266 Little boys are cheap today 729 01:10:38,400 --> 01:10:41,033 Cheaper than yesterday 730 01:10:41,166 --> 01:10:43,633 Smaller boys are.... 731 01:13:08,433 --> 01:13:11,466 Why don't you ask for the butter if you want it? 732 01:13:26,233 --> 01:13:28,200 That's enough of that. 733 01:13:31,700 --> 01:13:33,400 Go to your room. 734 01:13:56,166 --> 01:13:57,533 Well, he won't look at me. 735 01:13:57,666 --> 01:13:59,266 He doesn't talk. 736 01:13:59,400 --> 01:14:02,733 I've insisted he says thank you and he says it to the ceiling... 737 01:14:03,033 --> 01:14:04,133 ...or to the fireplace. 738 01:14:04,266 --> 01:14:07,766 And it's been going on three weeks now. 739 01:14:08,133 --> 01:14:11,766 I don't know why he continues with the visits. Every day I expect a phone call... 740 01:14:12,066 --> 01:14:14,366 ...to say he decided he doesn't want the adoption. 741 01:14:14,500 --> 01:14:17,000 -Do you wanna go on with it? -I suppose I must. 742 01:14:17,133 --> 01:14:20,233 Otherwise, I'd pull out myself. 743 01:14:20,366 --> 01:14:21,700 But you're not sure. 744 01:14:22,000 --> 01:14:27,200 Well, everything was fine until the letter. 745 01:14:27,333 --> 01:14:29,400 What did the one you got say? 746 01:14:29,533 --> 01:14:31,133 Nothing. 747 01:14:31,433 --> 01:14:33,100 And what did the one Jamie got say? 748 01:14:33,233 --> 01:14:35,500 Oh, everything. 749 01:14:35,800 --> 01:14:42,000 It was very fair, very honest, very loving... 750 01:14:42,133 --> 01:14:45,000 ...devastatingly moving letter. 751 01:14:49,566 --> 01:14:51,466 You answer it. 752 01:14:52,533 --> 01:14:55,200 Hello. Pileth Post Office. 753 01:14:58,566 --> 01:14:59,800 It's the hospital. 754 01:15:57,133 --> 01:16:00,066 My father died on Thursday morning. 755 01:16:03,100 --> 01:16:05,700 So I may not be very good company. 756 01:16:07,766 --> 01:16:13,733 I wasn't sure whether to ask you to give this weekend a miss. 757 01:16:17,433 --> 01:16:19,366 Perhaps I should have. 758 01:16:21,400 --> 01:16:23,166 I'm sorry. 759 01:17:41,066 --> 01:17:42,600 You'll be all right. 760 01:17:42,733 --> 01:17:44,600 Promise. 761 01:17:53,733 --> 01:17:55,500 It won't be long. 762 01:18:25,633 --> 01:18:28,666 I was always a disappointment to him. 763 01:18:29,666 --> 01:18:31,700 I don't think so. 764 01:18:49,100 --> 01:18:54,433 I never knew what they really wanted of me. 765 01:18:57,433 --> 01:19:00,533 Was there never a time? Ever? 766 01:19:03,766 --> 01:19:07,200 Depends on what you mean by "a time." 767 01:19:08,600 --> 01:19:11,266 Didn't you ever love anyone? 768 01:19:13,533 --> 01:19:15,266 I don't know. 769 01:19:15,633 --> 01:19:17,066 Maybe. 770 01:19:20,633 --> 01:19:22,066 Hi. 771 01:19:22,200 --> 01:19:24,600 Whatever it was, she was right out of my class. 772 01:19:29,433 --> 01:19:31,800 It would never have worked. 773 01:19:34,433 --> 01:19:36,600 Go to sleep now. 774 01:19:38,433 --> 01:19:40,466 I'll still be here. 775 01:19:49,766 --> 01:19:52,533 Whether adoption goes through or not doesn't depend on me. 776 01:19:52,666 --> 01:19:56,433 But in the meantime, James is coming up for 11 and he'll be changing schools. 777 01:19:56,566 --> 01:19:59,366 And if you adopt him, he'll be going to your local school. 778 01:19:59,500 --> 01:20:01,433 Silly is making you start twice. 779 01:20:01,800 --> 01:20:04,033 So we're recommending that in the meantime... 780 01:20:04,166 --> 01:20:07,600 ...you should foster James with a view to adoption. 781 01:20:08,766 --> 01:20:12,200 -Which means? -He comes to live with you. 782 01:20:44,433 --> 01:20:46,600 Look, there's the new boy. 783 01:20:55,766 --> 01:20:59,400 Germ warfare. That's why the Conservative lost. 784 01:20:59,533 --> 01:21:01,133 His name was Jeremy Anthrax. 785 01:21:01,266 --> 01:21:03,600 I'm so sorry, I don't want to interrupt anyone. 786 01:21:03,733 --> 01:21:05,600 I'm sure you have lots to talk about. 787 01:21:05,733 --> 01:21:08,133 Who'd want to vote for a name that sounds like a cough sweet? 788 01:21:08,266 --> 01:21:09,800 I just happened to be in a teensy bit of a hurry. 789 01:21:10,100 --> 01:21:11,400 It's the dry cleaning, is it? 790 01:21:11,533 --> 01:21:15,300 I believe I did tell you, Mrs. Hilliard, the delivery's not till Thursday. 791 01:21:15,433 --> 01:21:17,633 Please don't apologize. It's quite all right. 792 01:21:17,766 --> 01:21:20,200 When one's used to 24-hour service.... 793 01:21:20,333 --> 01:21:23,233 Well, I was going to look at some knitting wool... 794 01:21:23,366 --> 01:21:26,366 -...but everybody's in a rush. -Oh, Lizzie, look at the wool. 795 01:21:26,500 --> 01:21:29,700 No, I don't wanna be an inconvenience. I'll come back tomorrow. 796 01:21:30,000 --> 01:21:31,300 Lizzie.... 797 01:21:31,433 --> 01:21:34,200 No, you haven't got the time for it. 798 01:21:36,233 --> 01:21:37,566 Hilliard. 799 01:21:38,533 --> 01:21:40,766 Hilliard, dry cleaning. 800 01:21:43,433 --> 01:21:45,466 Be with you in a moment. 801 01:21:56,433 --> 01:21:57,733 I'm Jimmy's father. 802 01:22:03,533 --> 01:22:05,766 You'd better come inside. 803 01:22:19,266 --> 01:22:21,633 They've released you early? 804 01:22:21,766 --> 01:22:25,266 It's just one less death certificate to write out. 805 01:22:27,400 --> 01:22:29,066 Where's Jimmy? 806 01:22:30,600 --> 01:22:33,600 He's at school. He'll be back at 4:30. 807 01:22:34,600 --> 01:22:36,600 Doing well there, is he? 808 01:22:37,000 --> 01:22:38,533 Pretty well. 809 01:22:39,233 --> 01:22:41,666 Jimmy's been there only a month. 810 01:22:43,300 --> 01:22:44,533 Trying to work out a way... 811 01:22:44,666 --> 01:22:47,300 ...where I can get a look at him without him seeing me. 812 01:22:51,266 --> 01:22:52,666 No. 813 01:22:53,600 --> 01:22:55,266 Sorry? 814 01:22:56,100 --> 01:22:58,133 It won't do. That's not the way. 815 01:22:59,133 --> 01:23:00,566 What...? 816 01:23:01,666 --> 01:23:03,433 What is it? 817 01:23:05,066 --> 01:23:06,100 It's AIDS. 818 01:23:11,066 --> 01:23:12,733 Do you mind waiting here till lunchtime? 819 01:23:13,033 --> 01:23:14,600 I've got the shop to look after. 820 01:23:24,100 --> 01:23:27,166 I've managed to keep Jimmy thinking I've been in prison ever since. 821 01:23:27,300 --> 01:23:28,766 You hid out in the woods? 822 01:23:29,066 --> 01:23:32,300 Yeah, but I've been in and out three times since then. 823 01:23:33,266 --> 01:23:35,166 You know how it is. 824 01:23:35,600 --> 01:23:39,133 Petty offenses, burglary, nicking cars... 825 01:23:39,266 --> 01:23:42,333 ...receiving drugs, you know, that kind of thing. 826 01:23:44,600 --> 01:23:47,766 I'd like to have seen him, but it seemed fairer not to. 827 01:23:48,066 --> 01:23:50,233 He thought you were a mercenary soldier. 828 01:23:52,133 --> 01:23:54,366 Now, you'd like to know how long they've given me. 829 01:23:55,266 --> 01:23:58,433 I've got four or five months. 830 01:23:58,733 --> 01:24:01,700 Now, if I could just hang around somewhere outside the village-- 831 01:24:02,200 --> 01:24:05,333 And in a year's time, when someone has to tell him you're dead? 832 01:24:05,466 --> 01:24:08,033 If you were that selfish, I'd tell him the truth. 833 01:24:08,166 --> 01:24:10,466 I'd tell him you could come see him but you didn't. 834 01:24:10,600 --> 01:24:13,600 Make sure he recognize you, meet the bus, point you out to him. 835 01:24:16,266 --> 01:24:19,000 What does it feel like, eh? Holding all the cards? 836 01:24:28,000 --> 01:24:32,666 Now, here's what we'll do. 837 01:24:37,200 --> 01:24:39,066 You'll move in here. 838 01:24:40,600 --> 01:24:42,433 We'll tell Jamie what your illness is. 839 01:24:42,566 --> 01:24:45,600 We'll give its proper name because he has the right to know... 840 01:24:46,433 --> 01:24:49,266 ...that his father has a few months to live. 841 01:24:51,400 --> 01:24:54,466 The village doesn't have to know though they may guess or find out. 842 01:24:54,600 --> 01:24:56,766 Only the doctor has to know. 843 01:24:57,766 --> 01:25:00,733 The Hippocratic oath should take care of him. 844 01:25:02,600 --> 01:25:04,500 Are you always like this? 845 01:25:05,766 --> 01:25:08,400 No, never. I'm not the masterful type. 846 01:25:16,100 --> 01:25:18,100 All right, kids. 847 01:25:18,500 --> 01:25:21,633 You've got a broody expression like a hen with constipation. 848 01:25:21,766 --> 01:25:24,466 Well, don't, because I've got the remedy. 849 01:25:24,600 --> 01:25:26,500 We're going camping this weekend. 850 01:25:26,633 --> 01:25:28,800 It'll be great. 851 01:25:31,533 --> 01:25:33,266 Not this weekend. 852 01:25:33,400 --> 01:25:35,166 Why not? 853 01:25:38,766 --> 01:25:40,766 We have a visitor. 854 01:25:45,000 --> 01:25:47,100 We never have visitors. 855 01:26:16,533 --> 01:26:18,300 Hello, Jimmy. 856 01:26:20,100 --> 01:26:21,766 Who do you love? 857 01:26:45,766 --> 01:26:47,800 Last time I saw you... 858 01:26:48,100 --> 01:26:51,266 ...I said the next time we meet will be forever. 859 01:26:53,033 --> 01:26:55,700 There's nothing forever for me and you, Jimmy. 860 01:26:56,700 --> 01:27:00,166 I came to find you, to make sure you're all right. 861 01:27:00,766 --> 01:27:03,033 You're a credit to me, Jimmy. 862 01:27:03,166 --> 01:27:04,766 You're a grown man, almost. 863 01:27:05,700 --> 01:27:09,466 Graham says I should be honest with you about my illness. 864 01:27:09,700 --> 01:27:12,400 He said we should spend the next few months... 865 01:27:12,533 --> 01:27:16,433 ...the last few months getting to know each other again. 866 01:27:17,700 --> 01:27:19,733 Don't be scared. 867 01:27:21,066 --> 01:27:23,000 Don't look so frightened of me. 868 01:27:26,033 --> 01:27:27,633 Oh, Jesus, God. 869 01:27:31,066 --> 01:27:34,366 Please say you're not frightened of me, Jimmy, please. 870 01:27:35,333 --> 01:27:37,500 I'm so sorry, Jimmy. 871 01:27:37,633 --> 01:27:40,533 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 872 01:27:44,433 --> 01:27:47,266 -Just give him time. -Jimmy? 873 01:27:50,166 --> 01:27:51,666 Jimmy? 874 01:27:53,566 --> 01:27:55,766 Jimmy! 875 01:30:21,066 --> 01:30:23,433 You just need to give him a little time, John. 876 01:30:23,566 --> 01:30:25,466 All he needs is time. 877 01:30:44,433 --> 01:30:46,000 Jamie? 878 01:30:51,700 --> 01:30:53,633 Jamie! 879 01:30:54,200 --> 01:30:56,600 Jamie! 880 01:31:16,800 --> 01:31:18,566 Jamie. 881 01:31:24,000 --> 01:31:25,633 It won't take long. 882 01:31:25,766 --> 01:31:28,233 Please promise you'll be a good boy. 883 01:31:30,100 --> 01:31:31,633 Jamie? 884 01:31:36,700 --> 01:31:39,166 Jimmy, be a good boy so we can play our game. 885 01:31:40,366 --> 01:31:42,600 Hide there for me, baby. 886 01:31:44,433 --> 01:31:46,600 Hide there for me, baby. 887 01:31:55,600 --> 01:31:59,766 Stop. Wait, don't rush. Take time. 888 01:32:50,800 --> 01:32:53,800 Jamie! 889 01:33:22,100 --> 01:33:23,166 Jamie. 890 01:33:25,533 --> 01:33:28,466 Jamie. Jamie. 891 01:33:32,000 --> 01:33:33,033 There. 892 01:33:33,166 --> 01:33:36,266 Jamie. It's all right. 893 01:33:37,433 --> 01:33:39,266 Jamie. 894 01:33:40,266 --> 01:33:44,266 Jamie. Jamie. Jamie. 895 01:33:47,033 --> 01:33:48,600 Jamie. 896 01:33:51,266 --> 01:33:52,600 Jamie. 897 01:33:54,566 --> 01:33:56,300 Jamie. 898 01:34:00,433 --> 01:34:04,000 Jamie. I know where you've gone. 899 01:34:04,133 --> 01:34:06,533 I know where you're hiding. 900 01:34:17,400 --> 01:34:22,100 To have nothing, to feel nothing. 901 01:34:22,566 --> 01:34:24,533 To be nothing. 902 01:34:27,400 --> 01:34:29,266 It doesn't work. I've tried it. 903 01:34:29,400 --> 01:34:31,200 Why him? 904 01:34:32,033 --> 01:34:33,366 And not me? 905 01:34:33,500 --> 01:34:36,466 We can start from day one. 906 01:34:36,600 --> 01:34:38,733 Then we can go from good to better. 907 01:34:39,033 --> 01:34:41,433 Anything's possible, Jamie... 908 01:34:42,266 --> 01:34:44,800 ...except feeling nothing. 909 01:34:45,633 --> 01:34:48,066 That's never possible. 910 01:36:27,433 --> 01:36:30,266 I won't be second best, Jamie. 911 01:36:31,566 --> 01:36:35,600 If it's going to work, it has to be as father and son. 912 01:36:39,766 --> 01:36:42,600 Take it or leave it. It's up to you.